some lines are better left incmplete.

a place inside
One’s ownself
Dark and cold
One knows about
Acceptance refused
Fakes surrounding
Believes portrayal
Sharp thoughts
Bleeding mind
Inside one
Cheering demise
Flashing m0ments
Still denying
Questioning existence
Rested unanswered


not everything ends well…

Her appeal for reduced sentence was again rejected. She has now completed 3 years serving central jail. The soon-to-fuse bulb, sometimes made her remind of what now seemed a previous life to her and that she was reincarnated as a prisoner in this cell. Every moment glancing a look at her past life,the pain of death went over her with every minute being spent in the cage where she gets enough food for survival and has no excuse to die! She learnt the native language of the place where she was in these years at jail. She had accepted that she would one day ‘may’ get out and welcome the sun with open arms inspite of knowing her sentence, so she thought to make the best of her time there. She maintained a good character there because she was silent. It sometimes made her catch hold of the flashback of how she reached there. The journey she has been through had been greatly unexpected; a bumpy ride,on the cost of smooth one. She was granted life in the sentence of court stating her life imprisonment when she needed death.
Life doesn’t always give you what you want or what you expect you’ll get. She was married to a man chosen by her family back there in a Middle Eastern country. Belonging to a foreign country, he was thought to be rich with all luxuries one can ever imagine. Being a parent of daugher,what else would one want beside securing her future…. So they married her as she had “to have” no objection with it. She began to knit dreams of her blooming future life. She was quite happy being his bride. Her contour was up with pride being the only girl from town to go abroad. Her parents did a finest mistake by not doubting his intentions to marry their daughter and they realized it after 2 years of her marriage when they got a foreign call.
When she reached the place, it was a new world. Her husband was well established and the take off of their marrige flight was safe. A year went by happily in his arms. But as said life is not a rosebed, She did a blunder. She touched the petals of rose before knowing that twig has most thorns and not even one was removed before being given to her!! I guess the rose was black, symboling grief from the moment it grew but dint mean anything to the blind, blind in love-cum-fantasy! Since, joys don’t last long, soon he was bored of her and that day, scheduled with his return from business trip, he brought someone with him. That someone was beautiful, young, tall, tucked in jeans with blonde hair and a black hat…
She entered her house and stepped over her world like an ant. Soon after the husband of both came to arrange some food for his new bride, she was looking from a distance with a smile on face, as if she was laughing at her fate. The laugh was then replaced by anger and she tried to dig the dagger in his flesh but was stopped and was beaten until she bled. He then went to his room and she was on floor with all scattered glass pieces around her. Each corner was tearing her in soul. She didn’t feel the wounds. Her world seem to vanish. She then sat in a corner and drew her legs close. The pupa that thought itself as a butterfly that was ready to leave the cacoon, was shown that his thought cost him life as cacoon was ruptured! She then went out sobbing. At stairs she sat and felt the air at her face. It was visible that more air was required to dry her tears.
Dawn cracked and woke her up. She was calm with burning eyes and a blocked nose coupled with non-speaking lips. May be she thought all that happened was a nightmare or it was a sign of an upcoming storm? She grew cold and straight forward in attitude. That innocense she brought with her, has left her. She was just a mass of cells that was insensitive to his second wife and taunting to his husband who rarely spoke to her.
People say time heals but she sank deep in dark with no rope of light. She drew a fence around herself nailed like a porcupine skin. Touch her and you’ll get hurt. For the very first time she regret her parents decision but blamed fate. She out of quiet frustration, bought a pack of cigarette and went of roof. There she stood alone choking the first few puffs but still continued. Her lungs then accepted what they rejected first and started working the way she directed. There were drugs, alcohol and other stuff she could get in but in depression, she chose the most devastating weapon that she thought would help her to get out of blackhole as she believed she had nothing to loose but she didn’t know it could destroy her in no time. She made her way to the nearest cafe’ and started using internet most of the times. She made friends at cafe’ whom she usually went out with. They were the ones whom she thought were kind enough not to let her face that hell everyday she lived in. But they were not her type. She was keen to leave this land forever and serve her parents, but she wanted a quiet exit. One of the friends at cafe’, got to know about her wish. She started being more friendly to an extent that they smoked together. She never thought she’d ever share the smoke but life comes unexpectedly and that was the only way to get relief from her stresses. She was then introduced to a tall dark African as a friend. They exchanged numbers and started meeting daily. She still hated men, after what she was treated with but she had to get out of the beautiful cage of her husband.
She was in need of money and He was a drug dealer who wanted someone to smuggle his stuff from other country. They made a perfect business pair. She agreed to do his work and thought it was easy!
Thoughts are to be dumped sometimes but realization is after the act. The nightmare had just begun and she was arranged a trip to Europe where she was left to enjoy for a week. She did max she could to have fun but then back to business. She was called to a place, where she was taped with drugs allover her body in a way she couldn’t remove. She couldn’t feel her body. The taped drugs were blended in her. The promised sum of money couldnt force her to backoff. She was caught while her work! The trial granted her life sentence and she was in a new world of jail. The jail isn’t what it actually seems. The prisoners are slaves cum entertainers from different parts. Every night they stood up in line and ones virginity was put at stake and the ones left, were servants cleaning any left evidences of crime. Her cell was nothing but 2 beds, a bulb, a writing table and a shit place. Her cell mate has been twice to someone else’s bed rather than the cell’s in one year time. She thought she was lucky not to be chosen until that day! If refused,she’ll be bruised, if accepted, her soul bruised. She wasn’t given time to refuse and was taken to a 3star hotel room…1002 she can never forget. Next morning was not normal for her. She had slept with whom she didn’t know. She felt a disgust that was newly introduced to her. Something that made her question herself. Was it fate? Was it destiny? Was it her act? Was it her desire? Was it her fault?
She still awaits any sign to see barless picture of sky… Her journey hasn’t end until she gets out or it has? coz not all endings are happy!